Monday, March 10, 2008


So this is going out on a limb a little bit, I guess. But... remember my friends that I asked y'all to pray for? They could use some more of the same. Their souls are weary and in need of respite. Their hearts are strong and keep pushing forward, despite feeling rather numb. As well as being agony to live, it's terribly difficult to watch -- especially the kids. These friends expressed the same when things were newly revealed with me and mine.

Here's the going out on a limb part: I'm recommending a couple of things on the subject. Why?


I'd say that by now it's pretty obvious that I'd give just about anything to have a do over with a certain someone. (You've noticed this here, yes?) So in case anyone else is standing on the verge of something, here are a couple of resources, things I wish I'd known. You might find them helpful.

First, anything by Dr. John Gottman. He lives and breathes the study of relationships and is funny to boot. He thoroughly knows whereof he speaks and grad students scramble to get in under his tutelage. Somewhere in my stack of parenting books I have his book Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child. I haven't gotten too deeply into it (too much of life creeping in, I suppose), but it characterizes his reputation for good sense and successful relating. Since the planet at large is running short on time and rarely sits down to read anymore, you can get his marriage wisdom on CD here.

Also, this set. I realize that she's more controversial and people have their own distinct opinions of her and her affect. Whatever. If she turns you off, fine. Skip it. But her thoughts on cherishing each other in marriage are sturdy ones and will be indispensable for many.

If you're reading this and have any other suggestions, please share them in the comments section.

Know that wherever you are, if you're struggling, you are not alone. Yes, this is hard. But it's not the first nearly unbearable thing you've ever done. You will be okay. Better than okay. You are well made, suited for life, created to conquer its challenges. There are many great resources and folks everywhere are praying for you. Shoot, the universe itself is cheering as you make and remake this commitment to your family. Look around, the evidence for all of this is everywhere.

So that's pretty much it. I have to go repack my guts back into my belly now. (blushing)


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