Odd things

So I called for directions yesterday after noticing on the urology website that there was mention of the dept having moved. Apparently I had the wrong number, because I got directions from a very nice lady who assured me that in fact we wanted to come into the hospital, not go to another building, and? She was wrong. So we missed the appointment altogether. Q had been in his car seat off and on for hours by then, traffic being what it is when trying to make it to a four pm appointment, and he had just plain had it.

But we weren't done, oh no. I reached the pediatrician's office and, since we had to drive past it anyway, just went in. Yesterday Q's diapers were drier than normal and something like urea, but not like urea, was present. I showed the diapers to the nice doc (not our usual) and he didn't know what to say. Q has had a fine little rash over his trunk and a bit on his fat little bum yesterday, but it was of course gone when the doc looked. Otherwise, there was no redness, which there would be if there were an infection (UTI). Q's temperature was just 99. There was less discharge last night (of whatever it was) and hopefully it will be gone this morning with no further effects. Meanwhile, the urology appointment has been rescheduled to October 24 and I have a urine collection kit in case it's still there.

Last week I went to pick up the van from having it's Service Engine Soon light rechecked (it had been in the previous week for broken parts, etc.). As I was leaving, the nice man (in his 60's) at the counter mentioned that he was a single parent (for his grandson) and boy, it's hard work. "It sure is," said I. I mentioned that I'm doing the same, with five. He said that dating sure is hard. Not that there's much time for it. But people mostly have enough to deal with without taking on anyone else's kids, he sure doesn't want to worry about someone else's kids, especially having already raised four. And then, to me: "I mean, let's be honest: nobody wants you... with five kids."

Wow. So is it just me or is that weird? I can make up my own negative internal dialogue, thanks, without any help from strangers. I think part of my being so startled at his comment is that I am so not in that mode. I can't imagine dating. I can imagine wanting to--I liked being married. A lot. But one doesn't just replace a beloved spouse, especially with young kids in the picture, especially with issues like Q's. Still shaking my head.

I've been up for hours already, turning things over in my head, praying for folks I know going through some really tough stuff, praying for the nice people at my attorney's office, praying for some pregnant mamas. Off to the shower before rushing about for the rest of the day.

Hugs to you and your families. I so miss that sacred space of hearth and home and spouse's embrace... Tomorrow is another court date--as always, prayers for cool heads, clear thoughts, the wisdom of Solomon, are all appreciated.

Peace.